Mother's Day is What You Make It.
"10 ways to make her feel special today"
"Best Mother's Day Gifts for 2020"
"10 Ways to Celebrate Mom".....and the list goes on.
Because it is an expectation. According to this article I quickly googled this morning, "Mother's Day Suffragist and writer Julia Ward Howe first suggested the idea of Mother's Day in the United States in 1872. Howe was a pacifist and saw the holiday as a chance to unite women and rally for peace. For several years, she held an annual Mother's Day meeting in Boston."
It became an official holiday in 1914 after West Virginia activist Anna Jarvis created the holiday that is celebrated today.
"In 1908, Jarvis campaigned for a national observance of the holiday in honor of her mother, who was a community health advocate. Her mom had organized several Mother's Day Work Clubs that addressed child rearing and public health issues, and Jarvis wanted to commemorate her and the work of all mothers."
So that is the boring historical part of Mother's Day. Now let's bring in the notsofun part of Mother's Day, shall we?
UNMET EXPECTATIONS. It kills it Every. Single. Time. I learned a while ago that Mother's Day is what I make of it. I can sit back and be pissed off that my family is sorely lacking in their creativity, or worse, that they are doing what I tell them out of fear that I will be mad. Either way, it is up to me and only me to make this day bearable. How do I do it?
THE FUN PART? I start by wishing myself a happy Mother's Day to ME! (This works great with birthdays too!) I wake up and decide to be happy and do something fun. This morning, Cam and I drove by Lamar's donuts and decided not to wait in line. Then we tried to grab a coffee at the Caribou drive-thru which was a no go. Then we drove past HyVee laughing at the herd of people walking in during a pandemic just to be sure they do all the right things on Mother's Day. Then I got my diet coke, went home, and made breakfast and we went for a walk.....which was 2.31 miles; exceedingly close to that of #runwithmaud which got me all in the feels about how his mom is without him today. (Google that story if you don't know it.) I messaged a bunch of moms I love and respect. We are a sisterhood of moms!
I am CHOOSING to be happy simply because I GET to be the mom of two great kids. I CHOOSE to be grateful for this unexpected time together and for the many meals, walks, and talks we have had. I CHOOSE JOY like any other day. And if I feel cranky later, I will HONOR that as well.
So if you're struggling today because of the million reasons I can think of...you've lost your mom, you want to be a mom and that hasn't happened for you, you have a difficult relationship with your mom, you aren't being recognized...you name it. Just remember, this is a made-up holiday. You can choose to make your day what YOU want and not rely on anyone else.
And if nothing else, tomorrow is a new day.